2 Months

Dear Annie,

Today you are 2 months old! It is true what "they" say, time does move at a weird warp when you have a child - I can barely remember what life was like before you now, but it still seems like you just arrived!

Your Dad and I love you more with each passing day - sometimes the love just overwhelms us and we need to cover you with kisses, which sometimes you seem a little annoyed about :) You'll get used to it, that's for sure! We both really can't get over how stinking cute you are - you're really chubbing up lately, and those cheeks of yours are SO squeezable!

Annie, you are quite the particular little one - what pleases you at one time sure doesn't at another! Sometimes you are quite happy to be taken on a walk in the stroller or the Ergo, and other times you WILL NOT TOLERATE IT - but then you are silent the SECOND that we take you out of whatever blasted contraption we have you in and you are in our arms in your favorite position - up on someone's shoulder, or being bounced around in a seated position by your Dad (because your mom just doesn't have the arm strength for that maneuver!). While this frustrates us to no end, we really can't blame you for it - you come from 2 quite picky parents after all :) Other times you DO NOT want to be held - but put you on the floor to kick around and you are happy as a clam for a good long time! You are the wiggliest little thing I've ever seen - in CONSTANT motion unless you are in a very deep sleep!

Speaking of sleep, it seems to be your most favored activity, since you do it a lot! Which mommy and daddy love :) You are a great little sleeper, even if your sleep is often punctuated by loud grunts, tiny squeaks, and other assorted noises. We have started a bedtime routine with you, and so far (3 days in) you seem to be getting the hang of it, because you sleep for quite a long time! I feed you one last time (which is usually the time you eat the worst - you're just not really interested at that point, but you DO need to eat!) we put you in your jammies, swaddle you up, and then Mommy reads you Goodnight Moon before Daddy rocks you a bit more, then puts you in your crib - you've even put yourself to sleep each night to the sounds of the rainforest thingie on your crib - way to go Annie! During the day, you like to sleep in your swing most of the time - and I sit on the couch for a lot of that time, just watching you because you look so peaceful!

While you still have your fussy times and get angry when something is not right in your world, you are SO happy and smiley a lot of the time - we have so much fun just laying with you on the floor having little "conversations" - you're making lots of noise lately, and let me tell you - it's nice to hear some giggles and coos come out of that mouth instead of cries :)

Annie, we love you so much, and are having so much fun watching you grow!

Love, Mom

8 Weeks

Yes, I know the doll and Annie are reversed this week, but she wasn't feeling the other side of the chair today!

What an eventful week for Annie and I! It started out on Sunday night when I left for a few hours and Annie REFUSED to take the bottle, period. Not a single drop (except that which was spilled out by trying) and freaked out until I got home. Poor baby (and poor Daddy dealing with that!). After that, we all needed a few days break... Becca came over on Wednesday and tried again during the day, and Annie took 2oz after about an hour - sort of a success! Ben tried again on Friday night, and she didn't take it that time either, and just passed out. But then tried again the next morning and she took 2oz again, like a champ, and today took 2.5oz in like 6 minutes!! Maybe she just doesn't like to eat in the evenings?? Sometimes she is crappy with breastfeeding in the evening too, so who knows. Whatever - at least we are making progress! Someday we'll actually get her to eat a whole feeding from a bottle :)

Annie with her first teddy bear, a present from the professional association board I serve on!

Mom & Baby class was also an experience, starting with me LOCKING MY KEYS AND ANNIE in the car while it was running! Oh lordy, was I ever freaking out! Thank heavens for AAA! They got there in about 20 minutes, and Annie (who was covered with a blanket in her carseat - probably a good thing I couldn't see her face!) seemed happy as a clam when I got her out, but I was still a mess! I felt like such a moron, but I guess it's better to have this happen when it is not too hot or cold out..... and now it sure won't ever happen again! The class itself was good - I can't believe there is only one week left! We did infant massage again, and Annie seemed to enjoy herself - I'm trying to give her a massage almost every day now - just another thing to add to her activity time :)

As I mentioned in my last post, there were a few outings that we took that didn't go so well. First, I took Annie to my mom's work - she was okay when I first got there, but then one of her coworkers wanted to hold Annie and it all kind of went downhill from there and turned into a scream fest :( She eventually calmed down and fell asleep, but it was definitely embarrassing! We also went out to breakfast and then to the Como Conservatory with Becky and Adelaide - Annie was super fussy at breakfast (due to being overtired) and cried kind of a lot until she finally fell asleep - again, embarrassing!

Annie with Grandma after finally falling asleep


at Java Train with Rebekah and Adelaide - a brief break from crying :)

At the conservatory, finally peacefully sleeping!

I know I'm probably the only one who cares when she cries, but it just makes me feel like a horrible mother and like everyone in the place is judging me. I know that is irrational but that's how I feel! It makes me kind of want to never leave the house with her because she does SO much better when we just stay at home, but I want to be able to take her out too! I'm not sure what the perfect moment is - I've had good and bad outings with her at all points - immediately after feeding, waiting a little bit after feeding.... so I'm not sure. Most of the time when she gets fussy it's because she's tired and can't figure out how to fall asleep - this process is difficult enough at home, much less in public. She doesn't seem to enjoy being passed around from person to person, which is sad for all those who want to meet her. I could try putting her in a carrier, but that's often hit or miss with her too! I do get really REALLY frustrated when I'm out and she's crying because I just want her to be one of those babies you can take anywhere.... but she sure isn't just yet! I guess for the next month or so, we'll just rely on babysitters when we want to leave the house, but even though we have like 10 people who have offered, I still feel bad asking, especially because it's usually at night when Annie is at her fussiest.

For those who think Annie is always happy - nope!! :) Annie with Aunt Liz and Dad, all wearing the same fabric :)

I broke down and bought the book Secrets of the Baby Whisperer (this is the book that promotes the "Eat, Activity, Sleep, You" routine) and I found it extremely helpful - mostly the chapter on understanding that crying is your baby's way of communicating with you, and that them crying does NOT mean they are angry at you or that you are a bad parent (see above irrational feelings!) - obviously at some point they are getting pissed, but it has really helped me to not feel like I need to immediately silence Annie, but to take a few seconds to figure out what might be amiss in her world. The one thing I felt was missing in the book is what to do if for some reason the routine is broken - that is where Annie seems to break down - if I miss her "tired" cues and she gets overtired that is pretty much 95% of the reason she cries. It seems this child requires a lot of sleep! And also what to do if you aren't at your house, and need to, you know, do things out in the world :)

This book and the ideas behind it have REALLY helped me though - when I looked back at my TotalBaby tracking on my iPhone to some of the early days with Annie, yowza - what a mess we all were. Pretty much every time she cried, I fed her... instead of realizing that sometimes she might just need to sleep, or have some other reason for crying. I think it is really important to "put the baby to the breast" a lot in the beginning to build your supply, but I just remember feeling so baffled and lost in the first few weeks. Ugh. SO glad that's over and done!!

One major milestone in our world this week was officially moving Annie to her crib at night! We finally purchased a monitor (I was waiting for a Babies R Us coupon to be valid) - we got a video monitor that is actually the same as our neighbors - it has 2 channels, so on one we can view Mia, and on the other, Annie - good thing we know them!!! Pretty freaky though :) I guess it makes sense, because between our two houses, it's probably a smaller area than some of the larger houses in the suburbs! The first 2 nights have gone REALLY well - she slept 7.5 hours solid each night, and we DEFINITELY slept better too! Last night was a little strange since she didn't really fall asleep until like 11 (normally she's out by 9pm) but whatever! Now we just need to start the process of teaching her how to fall asleep on her own... sometimes she's pretty good about it, but not always. We're going to start a firm bedtime routine this week. We are really so lucky she's been such an awesome sleeper - and we really did nothing to make that happen - it just did. I know she could very well regress, but it's been a good 3 weeks of her at least sleeping 4+ hour stretches, and several nights of 6+ hours - I think 8.5 is her max of going between feedings. Pretty amazing!

Another new thing for Annie this week is the beginning of her drooling - gross :) She has taken to sucking her tongue (?!?!?!) which results in a lot of froth around the mouth! Whatever keeps her happy, since she still has NO interest in a pacifier, and hasn't figured out how to reliably suck on her hands yet (except during tummy time when they are right under her mouth).

I really just can't believe that my tiny newborn is already almost 2 months old - it seems like a lifetime ago that we were in the hospital, but she still seems brand new! She is making so many new happy noises lately, and is super smiley during her playtime after eating! She is also content for longer and longer periods on her own - we were over at someone's house one evening, and she chilled out on her back and tummy by herself for like 40 minutes - awesome! I still sometimes just want to cry with how much I love her, but then can also get SO frustrated with her too - luckily the love overwhelms that :)

TGI Thursday

It's been kind of a rough week... not TOO bad, just a few semi-stressful outings with a cranky baby! It tires BOTH of us out! But still, look how cute she is??

Ben and I are BOTH counting down the days (6.5 work days!!) until he is HOME for the rest of my leave!!! I got used to his 3 day work weeks the past few weeks, and now on the 4th day of being by myself (except for that I have had an outing or a visitor each day, of course :) I am going a little nutso! Annie is sleeping now, and that always makes everything seem a little better - I know she is getting what she needs, and I get what I need - a little break!

7 Weeks

Our baby is practically all grown up! We just weighed her (just by setting her on our normal scale) and she's 10.8 lbs - a porker :) This week has been pretty great - the weather was awesome, Annie is getting more and more happy when she is awake (during the day at least - NOT in the evening!), and Ben was off work for a few days again! Only 2 more weeks until we are home together for 3 whole weeks - can't wait!!

Family photo, since we all looked halfway decent :)

In Mom and Baby class this week, we went over infant massage, which Annie seemed to enjoy - but then again, she just likes being naked I think :) She also seems to really enjoy just being on her back and left alone - she can hang out that way for a good 10-15 minutes now when she's in a good mood. It's kind of sad, because she's already preferring this to being held sometimes -yikes! Now I guess I can understand why some people miss the newborn stage - I will miss it when Annie doesn't want to be held at all!

This group again just shows me how almost every newborn gets fussy and how we really have it very good, especially with the sleeping - Annie is pretty good about taking a few long naps during the day, and will sleep anywhere from 5-8 hours at a stretch at night - hopefully she keeps that up! Ben and I are both getting better about not picking her up when we see her eyes open, because almost always she will go back to sleep (especially in her swing). She also has been pretty good about being able to fall asleep on her own if she wakes up when set down in her pack n play at night.

Annie got to take a trip with Dad to surprise Grandpa at his office on his birthday!

I had my 6 week post partum check-up on Friday - it was fun to see Margaret (the midwife) again, and to show her pics of Annie. Everything checked out fine, which is good! Kind of nice to know that I won't have to go back to that office for hopefully a LONG time - I had to sit in the exam room for about 30 minutes waiting for her, while I could hear her talking to someone in the next room - annoying!

Definitely the largest cause of stress this week was the stupid bottle. I mentioned in last week's post that Annie hasn't been taking the bottle as well now - well, that has definitely continued. We have been trying every day, and it is just a battle each time, and she'll usually take about an ounce and just stop. I called the baby advice line at the hospital and talked to the midwife about it at my 6 week appointment, and both basically said there are lots of things you can try, but really the only thing that works is just the baby figuring out that this is the only way they are going to get food, and that will happen eventually - they won't starve themselves. This is very annoying, because then I feel guilty leaving because I know whoever has her will have a battle getting her to eat, and she'll probably be hungry. I'm sure when daycare comes around, she WILL figure it out because she'll be starving, but it's just so sad to think about her getting to that point.

Some tummy time with Mia - we need to give her something to strive for :)


Starting to enjoy her bouncer as more than just a place to nap!

We still haven't had a discernible 6 week growth spurt where Annie wants to eat all the time - the person I talked to on the baby info line said it is possible that Annie just started taking in more at each feeding, but that it still might be coming. I wish it would just happen and be done already! She really has been not eating quite as often anyway - sometimes after she eats and plays, it takes her awhile to fall asleep, so I don't want to wake her, but it has been 3 hours - I'll let her go about 3.5 during the day before I wake her, but some days she's only been eating 6 times... hopefully that is okay! She still seems content when she's awake and has enough wet/dirty diapers so I am guessing it must be fine.

As I mentioned in an earlier post, it has been gorgeous here in Minnesota the past week - I have definitely gotten lucky with my maternity leave - lots of sunny nice days, which is a true gift here in March! We have been taking advantage of this by going for lots of walks, and sitting outside. I even managed to get sunburned just from sitting in the backyard - ha! We also went out to lunch at Groveland Tap with Annie - she was asleep at the beginning, but woke up later - she stayed content though!

The toughest part of this week was actually last night - we were at Ben's parents house for his dad's birthday dinner, and Annie just would not calm down - she is always fussiest in the evenings, and I think being passed from person to person didn't really help - she was just having a meltodwn! It's so sad when that happens, because I just want people to see the happy fun baby that we get to see during the day! She would occasionally fall asleep, but wouldn't stay that way, wasn't eating very well, and just in general was grumpy. It is really getting hard to watch others try to comfort Annie because Ben and I feel like we know how to calm her down... but I also want her to get used to being around people too... hopefully this evening fussiness doesn't last TOO long!

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Pissed that Dad was trying to give her a bottle... after 700 tries, she finally took about 1 oz and then fell asleep (even though it had been like 3.5 hours since she last ate!). Please ignore Ben's horrifying v neck undershirt.

It is a GORGEOUS day here in the Twin Cities! Becky called this morning to tell me she had the day off and to see if we wanted to go for a walk - of course! Well, I wanted to go for a walk, it seemed little Miss Annie did not want to be in her stroller, so Becky and I alternated holding her until she FINALLY fell asleep and would tolerate being in the stroller - wow, that gives the arms a workout to hold a baby and push a stroller at the same time - I guess I should have brought the carrier for her instead!

We walked across the Stone Arch Bridge, and stopped for coffee at Aster Cafe, where I had my first REAL nursing session in public - it went fine, except Annie barely wanted to eat. She kind of sucks at eating lately... she'll latch, come off, latch, come off, do the spaghetti suck in to my nipple instead of opening her mouth wide - very pleasant!! I'm not sure what her deal is, but it's annoying. She still apparently is somehow getting enough because she's still having plenty of dirty and wet diapers, but hopefully she figures out how to eat a little better soon!

Meeting the family!

Annie had QUITE an exciting Saturday - my parents graciously agreed to have a lot of my dad's side of the family over to meet Annie, since our house would get pretty cramped :)

I did a little baking for the first time in awhile - I finally got the chance to try out my new decorating tip, and FINALLY my cupcakes look the way I've always wanted them to! I made Guinness chocolate cupcakes (from this recipe) with cream cheese frosting and they were DIVINE!

Annie was a little fussy for some of the day, but not too bad - we all had a lovely day!

4 generations!


Grandpa and Annie - so cute!




Apparently not to happy to be meeting Ella!




Annie has just in the past few days started being okay just being left alone on the ground - kind of nice!

My aunt Mary made this awesome stocking for Annie - so cute!

6 Weeks

Wow, we got to the magical 6 week mark! The point when EVERYONE says it "gets sooo much better" :) And you know what? I think it is! I am finally feeling that overwhelming love that a lot of people seem to feel immediately after birth - it took me a little longer to come into it, but now sometimes when I look at Annie, I want to cry with how much I love her. And instead of being frustrated when she cries (well, sometimes I still am obviously - because I just want to know WHY!) I just feel sad that she's sad. Ben and I have just been remarking to each other constantly just HOW CUTE our little girl is - I can't even get over it!

Annie has had a pretty good week - the beginning of the week was probably worse in terms of crankiness with the peak at Wednesday - she was just fussy ALL day and wouldn't sleep longer than 30 minutes despite all of our best efforts, and had a few bouts of inconsolable crying in the evening. However, Thursday and Friday she was conked out pretty much all day long. I know when they go through growth spurts they need to sleep a lot, so that could be it, but she never had a day where she was eating way more than usual. Who knows!!

Mom & Baby class went well this week - we talked about some activities that you can do with infants and again talked about ways to help them get to sleep. A guideline that I've heard over and over again is that under 3 months of age, a baby should not be AWAKE for longer than 2 hours (including eating), which does seem to hold true for Annie - she gets cranky when she's awake for that long and starts to fight sleep - it's much easier for her to get to sleep if we try to get her to nap before she gets her diaper in a bunch and starts fighting sleep. We have started trying to get her to nap in her crib - it has gone pretty well - once she's sleeping, she seems to be fine sleeping wherever - she falls asleep best being rocked or walked around, or in her swing. At first, she seemed to not like the swing, but now she loves it - yay!

Annie is still grunting and writhing around when sleeping of course! This week was probably the worst for MY sleep - as I've mentioned, I'm a horrible sleeper - and the worse I sleep, the more I obsess about how much I WANT to go to sleep. It's a vicious cycle - I lay there thinking of how much I need sleep and how awful the next day will be if I don't sleep RIGHT NOW, and then it just never happens. I finally started using earplugs along with the pillow over my head and got a nice long stretch of sleep! Now I don't want to jinx anything, but last night Annie slept from 9pm - 4:30am (which was really 5:30am because of daylight savings time). WOW - that was amazing! My boobs were about ready to explode by that point, so it was a good thing she woke up!

Speaking of boobs, breastfeeding has still been going well - sometimes Annie still has issues keeping her latch, which is annoying... that has seemed to get a little better as the week went on. I'm not LOVING breastfeeding, but from what I've heard, it takes awhile to get to that point. Right now, it's fine, it isn't really that difficult, but I don't particularly enjoy it. I have been really lucky to not have any issues, and also, I don't really ever seem to leak or have really bad pain. I can easily go 6 hours without feeding, and while I feel full, I don't have to worry about leaking all over or being in pain like it seems that many women do. Since I have been pumping every morning after Annie's first or second feeding, I do feel like I need to have that "emptying" or else I feel uncomfortable the whole day. I like that I'm building a decent freezer stash, so should I ever want to go out and get completely bombed some night, Annie would still have sufficient nutrition :) That urge has not struck me yet, because that might require me to stay awake past 9pm, which isn't going to happen :) I had 2 glasses of wine when we were at Erik and Jen's house for dinner on Thursday, and that was almost enough to make me pass out!

Annie did seem to have some issues taking the bottle this week - per the recommendation of our pediatrician, we introduced a bottle at 2 weeks, and have been giving her 2 per week, which we might need to increase now to get her more used to it. She did finally take 1.5oz from a bottle yesterday, but the other times we tried she just screamed and I finally fed her from the boob (which is a bad precedent to set, but we were at someone's house and I didn't feel like letting her scream!). Hopefully she gets more used to the bottle, because she has 6 weeks before she'll need to take it like a champ several times a day at daycare!

Our little girl has started smiling much more regularly now - I still don't know if she QUITE realizes what she's doing, but I don't care :) So far, her favorite place continues to be her changing table - she is definitely at her smiliest there! She has also been finding her voice for something other than crying - I've heard a few gurgles and coos, and she did laugh in her sleep once (that I heard at least) which was just about the cutest thing I've ever heard (even at 3am). We have been stepping up activity time to include some of these activities that I found recommended on a message board - there are great ideas there if you are ever wondering what you can do with an awake newborn!

Wiggle worm


Rolling over!

I am now at the halfway point of my maternity leave! I still am excited to go back to work, but now I know that I really will miss Annie horribly when I'm gone - I've started missing her when she's taking long naps because I want to hold her again but don't want to disturb her :) I realized the other day that there was only one day of my leave so far where I haven't taken an outing or had a visitor - I think the main reason for that is that I quickly realized that when I stay at home all day alone, I go nuts!

Annie and I took a trip to the Mall of America this week - it is a great place to go with a potentially fussy baby since it's so loud anyway that a little crying doesn't do much harm, but it was hard to try to hold Annie and push the stroller at the same time... I did feed her once in Carter's, which has a beautiful feeding/changing room (for customers only - so I was FORCED to buy 3 cute outfits that were on sale :). I think it would be easier if I knew she would be okay in the moby wrap - I did try that again this week and she seemed okay, but one never knows with her! Ben had Thursday and Friday off, so we experienced what it will be like for us for 3 weeks in April when we are both home - kind of boring :) Ha! We took a VERY EXCITING trip to Ikea on Thursday, Annie slept the whole time. It was thrilling. The weather has been crap lately - raining and icky, so we couldn't go outside. Finally today it is super nice out, so we took a walk around the neighborhood!

One tip I wanted to share with people who have had screaming babies in the car is to turn the radio to static and turn it WAY loud - Annie was completely freaking out on the way to Erik and Jen's house on Thursday, and she was fed, changed, etc. Usually she eventually will fall asleep after fussing for a bit, but this time she was just having a meltdown! Luckily when I finally thought to turn on static really loud she shut right up and fell asleep! It was crazy, but it worked :)

Reconsidering...

Okay, thanks to this face, I don't want to trade Annie in anymore :)

Thanks to blog reader Julie, who had the same screaming while eating issue as me, we are now trying some different feeding positions as well as Mylicon drops... it seemed to help a lot last night - Annie was super happy and didn't cry or fuss AT ALL yesterday evening which is unheard of! I don't know if they are a miracle QUITE yet, as she was a bit fussy this morning, but hey - we got a fun happy baby for a few hours last night and it was amazing!